Single Vs. Married (with Children)

This is actually my favorite subject and can be a bit sensitive too. In all the companies I had work before, I was always being told - 'Hey you are single, you have so much freedom, you can save so much money'! You should be considerate with the married one, with so many mouths to feed and so many things to consider. Bottom-line the married ones should have more privileges.

With that comment, I went and look through the company benefits for single versus married employees. I found being single, we in fact has fewer privileges. I do not have coverage for my family, the married one does. During any company events, spouse is allowed for free, but I cannot bring my partner along. Family day is created because of them, not for the single one. We may end up volunteering to run the Family day event. However, yet, the Single has been branded with words like you are Richer, you are Loaded. How could this be?

Besides, today I have to pay my family bills and sometimes my siblings’ expenses. I may not see any differences in raising a child. Probably I am wrong, but definitely being Single is not easy.

Married, Divorced and Re-Married

Hello guys, today I went out lunch with a few colleagues. Then we brought up a colleague name which we know. I was not close to her but Miss ReMarried (RM) has an interesting marriage.

Miss RM in her probably early 50s were very dedicated to her work. Somehow during the peak of the career, she may had ignored her home and the husband divorced her and married a younger girl. The couple has teenage sons and daughters. Few years later, the husband divorced the younger wife and then reconciled with Miss RM. The husband found the younger wife was too demanding and realised the quality in Miss RM. Later Miss RM remarried the husband!

One of our colleague actually objected to this. Why would you remarried a guy who had dumped you before! Another colleague thinks, after you had spent half your life with your husband, you know them well, and it's not easy to give up!

What do you reckon? What will you do if you are in this position?

Long Distance Relationship

Anonymous (Miss KL) wrote :

i met this guy (Mr FarAway - Malaysian living abroad)last year and had been contacting each other thru MSN chat. I saw him again in recently in Overseas (the other side of the globe), and we started to do dinner together during the 1st week i was there. It was a sweet memory though... we did dinner together, and we found out we have so much in common. Both of us like mexican food, dislike vietnam food, dislike ancient Chinese series, like to do silly thing..etc etc..

Dr Love summarized: In summary, both Miss KL and Mr Faraway relationship kicked off well and they expressed each other feelings while in overseas. However, after Miss KL came back, Mr Faraway did not keep in touch frequently. Miss KL Sad feels very sad now. The next time Miss KL will meet Mr Faraway is during Chinese New Year in 2006.


Doctor Love replied :

Miss KL, I understand your feeling. You wish you can be with him and you have the fire in you now that you wouldn't want it to go away. However, long distance relationship is very tough. We always have this saying, "Out Of Sight Out of Mind". So what are you going to do about it?

I can attest to you that I have 2 friends who had the same issue just like you. Their lovers are abroad, however, in the end they got married, and my friends move to the country and live with their lovers, and now their husbands :-) In the beginning, their relationship was a bit rocky, coz everyone was too busy at work and they tend to lose that fire. To keep this up, one of the party has to be persistent (not aggressive) to make calls; talk about common things that happen to them everyday, basically something to talk about. Of course when there is a break, my friends went abroad or vice versa to spend more time with their lovers.

Hence, Miss KL, Communication is a key to you now. Even if he does not call, you can make the move. Just tell him how much you miss him. Tell him you are looking forward to see him. Send him a card or small gifts to show you care. Give each other a HOPE! Hope can turn into a REALITY. I would like to suggest whenever possible, pay a visit each other and spend more time (I know this could be expensive), this may show how committed you are you want this relationship to work.

So Miss KL, don't be sad, there is HOPE if you want it to happen. Does it while the fire or spark is still in both of you ;-) If you feel the spark is gone, then confirm with him, ask him if he wants to continue to keep this relationship. For Doctor Love, there is no such thing as not possible, all it takes is PLANNING ;-) Good Luck girl.

Will You Slave To Love?

Hi all

Lately it has been really quiet, not much love troubles out there! But hey isn't this a good news hence, my business is going "south". Nevertheless, I will still write hopefully can share some of the experiences I had or my other fans had.

I came across a couple who had been dating for more than 2 years. The guy was very spoilt as he came from a wealthy family. Hence no housework and errands to run. Well, MR Wealthy lives with Miss Nice, however, Miss Nice will do everything to makes MR Wealthy happy. I could tell Mr Wealthy cares about Miss Nice, but he never says I love you or something nice to her. But during dinner and movies, Mr Wealthy don't mind paying at all.

I once asked how does Miss Nice felt, and she said she don't mind doing the housejobs and keeping Mr Wealthy happy. But she wishes to hear the nice things from Mr Wealthy, which she found he is not good at Expressing himself.

I had also asked if Miss Nice can continue when her innerself may not be met. She confessed she struggled sometimes, because being a girl is like a pot of flower, which need to be watered from times to times.

From what I can see, Miss Nice is really slaving herself for the sake of love. And it may look desperate too. Miss Nice is not very pretty, but she is a smart girl. So my guess is she has no choice.

Would you encourage such relationship or have a relationship this way? As a doctor love, I just wish Mr Wealthy will be nicer and learn to express more.